Despairing !

[shoveltrash]

On the trainer front, I have given up on the idea of finding a "good" trainer here. Because I have been BRAIN-WASHED by EE and UDBB

:lol:

Muriel i believe that a "ground person" is most important, when you start riding again.  not necessarily a "trainer."  just someone to help you make sure your riding position is correct.  mirrors are invaluable for those with no access to regular instruction.  or even just someone to video tape you occasionally.

i love the fact that you are 'rediscovering' Linda   .  this *hiatus* may well be for the best, enabling you to improve your understanding of her temperment/character, and bettering the communication!  
a wonderful post to read  
i am happy for you!

[Linda Baia]

I am quite depressed and frustrated about all the situation ... I know it is a c**p way to start a thread.

Last week, I had my control visit for my broken vertebra. And ... I was told to keep the back brace for another 45 days     I was not expecting it ... TBH I am quite sore at time, but it seems more muscles related, no-pinched nerves  

I have been carrying on my ground work with Linda and Morgan. I am progressing nicely with Linda, but with Morgan  ... it seems that we have stepped backl for lunging. He had got this "new" habit ( I am not sure if it is new, but I did not lunge him before) that on the right lead on big circle, it is OKAY to bolt like a bonkers at full speed and sand-surfed me accross the arena  

It has happened three times. I have always asked POLITELY a down transition. But if he carries on, I think I will have to ask the down transition more assertively.  

On Linda's front, I have found somebody to ride her  .... I have very mixed feeling about it.
The rider is another private owner from the yard.

On the positive side :
 His riding was good. Linda went nicely for him, when I explained that it was better to leave her alone in her mouth  
I was please to see my mare behaving like I left her in end of august, not better but not worse ... what a relief !!

On the negative side :
But he has no idea how to handle her on the ground. I think after a week Linda would become UNhandleable from the ground. She is very dominant, cheeky and powerfull 17.1 +hh warmblood.
Then he did little things, like untying the rug from the front before undoing the legs and belly straps, what if Linda spooks and gets the rug tangled at her hind legs?
He did not make her stretch her back legs when cleaning her feet. I know I am being anal but ... it really bothers me !
Linda has this trick that she is very good at lunging YOU. she plants her feet and makes the handler turn around her. Well he just did that. I told him that he just has raise his arm toward her butt, and she will walk on. But he just ignored me, and he was dragging Linda around the yard ... It was a UGLY sight!

It made me to realise how much NH/western technique I use on the ground. I thought everybody did  
 

Now how do I tell him that I do not want him to handle my mare, without hurting his feeling? he is a very nice person ... just not good enough for my mare . What a snob I am !

That is for the horses and the riding.

End of september we had visitors from England. It was very nice to meet people from this board in person. It is also nice to have confirmation that it exists another type of horsemanship!!!
It was such nice bowl of fesh air and motivation. I wanted to organise some clinics...

I am now realising that HERE there is no interest. People are just happy to bask in their IGNORANCE!!! they will never pay the price for having a clinician unless it is a famous reining trainer, who will teach them how to better abuse their horses.

I am sorry but I have enough to see so much ignorance and abuse of horses. when adult beginners know how to trot and canter. That is IT! They know it ALL.

I have seen people asking their horse "to beg pardon", the horse would lick and chew ... Another one thinks he does Parelli, because he has a rope halter and rides with ONE rein, then without proper warming up, after the horse had his HARDFEED, he would work the horse to a sweat  ... jumping!!!

I am really SICK of it all ... But then i am so clever that I am the one with a broken back.

It is not fair and I am gutted!

Sorry ... I go off crying my self-pity


 

[Heather]

Oh dear Muriel,

Sounds like you need a simlator course once your back is ok, plus an in hand/ long reining workshop with Becky. This would at least give you some stuff to work on by yourself. I dont know who to recommend in Italy- it is hard enough here!

Heather

[Dark Cloud]

Oh Muriel cheer up often a break is great to do some thinking like Trish said. I understand your feelings about the ignorant horse people, where I live even my friends have no interest in really learning about riding, or horses for that matter, Ive tried to no avail to get numbers for trimming clinics and really good instructors but thay just arnt interested....? (shruging). I really hope you keep on healing well, that skiing / Lunging  dosnt sound as tho it would do an injured back any favours. I wouldnt worry too much about Linda, she may take this guy for a "ride" but she wont forget where your place in her life/heirachy is, maybe you need to say your happy for him to ride her on the proviso that he watches you do the groundwork she needs to stay "Un-procosious" (sorry sp!). Good luck  

[luckyrider]

Oh dear, so sorry Muriel!!!  

You're forgetting all the wonderful things you've done this year and the stuff you still have to look forward to once your horrid contraption is off.

You are still young, and Linda is still young.  This really could be a good thing for her -- she cannot stay a princess all her life!  Let your new rider sweat it out with her, if you are sure he's good enough in the saddle.  Honestly you've done very well to find him at all.  And you've moved heaven and earth for Linda and Morgan's health and wellbeing.  

You cannot be responsible for the other horses on your yard and the fact that their owners do not have your standards.  Have a look at how horses are kept and worked in really poor countries if you want something to worry about!!!

And, if it helps, and if (and only if) you hardly ever do this, let your fab OH know how beside yourself you are.  Go stark raving bonkers loopy right in front of him (you know, express yourself, but don't go as far as throwing stuff about or anything!).  It will be an enormous release and keep him thinking...  you may laugh but I did that with Rob recently.  I just went bananas about how my younger son's teacher had been rude to me and that had been the final straw etc etc.  You had to see Rob's face!  I have never lost it, ever before like this.  Afterwards I was exhausted but felt strangely elated.  And Rob was suggesting all sorts of drastic measures to keep me sane.  Very cathartic!

But above all, remember that we're all here, and you're a valued member of this board and we're all anxious to hear good news from you very soon.



 

[shoveltrash]

oh Muriel!  :(   i hate that you have to wear the back brace for 45 more days!!!

however, Linda will still respect *YOU* - no matter who handles her.  YOU know the importance of groundwork, and she knows you know it!  Linda may be able to push someone else around, but i seriously doubt it will have a huge effect on your relationship with her.
my boys are handled by the hired help at my new yard - they are not as persnickety as i am about leadtraining/groundwork, at ALL!  but my boy still know to mind me   .

so let the fella ride her, but were it me, i'd want to be there to watch - at least in the beginning!  and you could offer some groundwork "tips" too, to share your knowledge   .

btw i agree that lungeing is probably not good for your back  :unsure: .  

sending you LOADS & LOADS & LOADS of love/healing prayers/good vibes!
(((((((((HUGS!))))))))))
please know that you have a huge international support group here!  :blush:
Trish

[Linda Baia]

Thanks very much for your kind words. I am feeling much better to have such a moral support   B)

I think part of my problem is I find very frustrating not to be able to ride my horse   :(

Anyway, because we agreed on it, my friend rode Linda again this am. I showed him some groundwork. I think I have impressed him a bit. His horse is a hooligan on the ground, no manners whatsoever    :lol:  
He rode Linda very well. He went for the first time in the BIG arena! She has never been there. Plus there is a demolition site with digger and lorrries .. lots of noises and mess.

Linda did not bat an eyelid ... That is my horse !!!

So I am feeling much better about the situation  

Plus I was very naauuuuuuuuuuugthy .... I rode Linda too . Well I did two laps at the walk. Gosh it was wonderful, I secreted lots of endomorphins   :lol:

My YO saw me and screamt : "Muriel, scendi SUBITO di questa cavalla!!!" Well she said to dismount   LOL!

On the stupid owners front, one of the horses is lame too today. I was snotty and told me "how surprise I was NOT!"    

Anyway, thanks very much for your support, it really means something to me    

[Flashback]

Plus I was very naauuuuuuuuuuugthy .... I rode Linda too . Well I did two laps at the walk. Gosh it was wonderful, I secreted lots of endomorphins

although not to be recommended    it probably did you more good than harm on this occasion ............ just dont make a habit of it or you will be wearing that brace for a lot longer than 45 days!

i feel for you on the *ignorant folk* .......... it drives me totally wild when i see it going on but have decided for the good of my health and sanity unless they are actually physically abusing their horse i will just let it go .......... we all do things slightly differently and what is acceptable behaviour for one person is not for another.  its not pleasant but its something we have to learn to live with    for we are not going to change everyone!